The world is an extremely busy place. Especially for me, a mom that is working full time and going to full time school. The world is asking so much from me. It takes and takes and takes and I just have to live completely in the present no questions asked.
Everyday I fill my day with excelling at work, exercise, cooking, cleaning, guiding my little human, spreading love to my friends, family, and husband, learning, actively reading and searching for inspiration, journaling, and schoolwork. I find time for laughter, honest and deep conversations, space to fall in love, and space to expand into my full potential. By the time I get to my bed, I am ready to sleep. I am ready to rest my tired mind, body, heart, and spirit and start again the next day.
Lately, most days have been peaks. Peaks of Self Growth. Peaks of Self Love. Peaks of Relationship Growth between my husband and my daughter and my friends. Peaks of actualization after actualization of my past, present, and future. I am looking within and expanding out. I am taking every single moment to fully express my spirit within my human potential. So, by the time I get to the canvas, I don’t know if I have anything left to give. I question if painting is even what I should be doing with the time that I have managed to have. So I sit. I close my eyes. I meditate. And I begin to quiet my world. The space will clear and it will be a direct communication between this physical plane and my spirit.
I am one again with all that is cycling through me. I can feel my sensory overload begin to calm down. Reboot. Begin again. I can feel the messages of the universe and I can feel alignment. This is the cures of meditation. It is a balance. A checkup. A healing like if a person was to clean their house. Dust off the cobwebs. Clear the space in your heart. Hold hands again with your shadow. Return to the blessing that is the air that goes in and out of your lungs. It is hearing the life force that runs through your veins.
After I return to that stillness, I am inspired. Being busy is not inspirational. It is a distraction. It is outward energy. It is doing. If one was to break down the word inspired, they would find that it is the direct influence of God. Doing things is the direct influence of you and that is why meditation is so important or at least for me. To return to the direct influence of a higher purpose. It is those few moments where I can hear that little voice inside that says thank you. We are alive. We are beautiful and gracious and we want to paint the world with speculated wonder. So Meditation Matters to my Process and as I become silent I can paint again.
I can paint what I feel. Not what I am doing. Not what happened to me or what I am seeing. I can paint my emotions. I can paint the abstract intuitive desire that is burning inside me. And when I do paint it. I can only hope that someone else will look at that painting and go “hey, me too.”
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